En Espanol.

In the car.

Timothy (9): My name in Spanish is Tim-o-te-o.

Jonah (6): You have a different name in Spanish?  That's cool!

Stephen (7): What's my name in Spanish?

Me (35): Esteban.

Stephen: Huh?

Me: Es-te-ban.

Stephen: Wow.  Coooool.

Sam (3): What's my name in Spanish?

Me: Diego

My wife (29ish): That's James.

Me: No it's not.  Diego is Samuel.  It's also German for  . . .

My wife: Stop right there.  And you're wrong.  It's James.

Me: I'm so totally looking that up when I get home.  What did you take?  4 years of French . . .

Various boys: French? Awesome! Say something in French! That's so cool! What's my name in French?

My wife, calmly: Go ahead and look it up.  It's James.

Jonah: What's my name in Spanish?

Me: Um, . . . Chonah.

My wife: Yonah.

Jonah: That's it?  Spanish is a horrible language.

Me: Nice work.  You've got a Tancredo supporter back there.

My wife laughed.

I Forgot About This One

From memory, with apologies where they apply.

Me: So how did Jonah's last day of Kindergarten go?

My Wife: Pretty well.  But there was a problem at lunch.

Me: Really?  What happened?

My Wife: Well, they went outside to have a picnic, and they were all playing around near the trees.  Then they found a praying mantis . . .

Me (interrupting): Wow!  That's great.  Jonah loves praying mantises [he really does.  He makes them out of LEGO's, he draws them, he looks through the yard for them, etc.].

My Wife: . . . and then [name withheld] killed it.

Me: What!?!

My Wife: With a stick.  While Jonah was standing there.

Me: That kid's a [expletive].

My Wife: He killed the whole nest.  Jonah cried quite a bit ['tis true.  I've got pictures].

Me: Did Jonah recover? 

My Wife: Not while we were outside.  But once we went back in, he got better.

Me:  So that's why he asked if we could go to the zoo to see a praying mantis?

My Wife: Probably.  We can't have one in the house.

Me: You're preaching to the choir.  I don't like their bug books, even if they're turned over.  He's got a gentle spirit.

My Wife: Who? Jonah?  Yes.  Yes he does.

Actual Conversation, um IV?

Me, as the boys were running directly into the TV room from their bedrooms at 8:02 AM: "No TV until you've eaten your breakfast."

Jonah, jumping off the couch and running to the dining room: "Oh kizzay."

Me: "Jonah. Where did you hear that?"

Jonah, looking alarmed and stunned: "Is it a bad word?"

Me: "Not necessarily."

So much to unpack here, so little time . . .